It's the long awaited Jennifer Lopez episode of American Idol. The theme is Latin Week. How in the world is this woman going to help anyone with singing? Could she give a seminar on having a perfectly round behind though? Perhaps so. This should be interesting. The show opens with the contestants meeting J-Lo during her rehearsal. Rehearsal for what? Please, please tell me that she is going on a concert tour. That would be just about the funniest thing ever.
First up was Melinda. She did a song called "Sway". I wouldn't have chosen that song for her because it didn't really showcase her abilities, but she did well with it. Simon rightfully said it made her seem older. Well, she's gone. Next was Lakisha. Jennifer helped her with her movements. Now, that she knows about. She did "Conga", an excellent choice. Nice dress. She showed flare and personality that she hadn't showcased before. Randy thought it was good; Paula and Simon said it was a "safe" choice. They're laying the groundwork. Lakisha and Melinda are both going home this week.
Timberlake chose "Smooth" by Carlos Santana and Rob Thomas. It was dreadful. OMG The judges loved it. Paula said it was "hot". I need to stop watching this show. Jennifer worked with Haley on "Turn The Beat Around". Oh, Gloria Estefan remade it so I guess it qualifies as Latin. They brought Blake on to do some beatboxing in the rehearsal. I think I'm going to be sick. Haley came out in her little sister's booty shorts. Have you no shame? Go with what got you there, I guess. It couldn't be more obvious. The performance was brutal. Finally, even Simon told her that the only chance she has is to wear as few clothes as possible. Believe me, she already knew that. She should be on the block. I mean literally. She she be on the street corner with that outfit.
Creepy Phil is next. He did Santana's "Maria Maria". It was not hittin'. I am walking out if the judges like this. Randy and Simon said there was no passion and nothing to get excited about it. Paula said it was a good vocal. We'll of course ignore her. I can stay. I can remember a long time ago when I used to enjoy this show.
Jordin chose "Rhythm Is Gonna Get You". Has there been a song tonight that wasn't done by Gloria Estefan or Santana? It was an okay performance. Paula said she was adorable. Simon thought it was just okay, as I did. Blake did a song by Mark Anthony, Jennifer's husband. Kiss ass..................Is it over. I dozed off. The judges ate it up. I apparently have a different feed of the show coming into the House of Hollywood.
Last and certainly least, it's Sanjaya. He resembled a drowned rat. Unfortunately, he didn't do "She Bangs" like ew.com had suggested. That would have shot him into the stratosphere. He did a song which wasn't all that bad, which is the worse thing that could have happened to him. If my earlier prediction doesn't come true, it's Phil or Haley who will leave this week. Oh man, Jennifer Lopez is performing live tomorrow. Lord help us all.
First up was Melinda. She did a song called "Sway". I wouldn't have chosen that song for her because it didn't really showcase her abilities, but she did well with it. Simon rightfully said it made her seem older. Well, she's gone. Next was Lakisha. Jennifer helped her with her movements. Now, that she knows about. She did "Conga", an excellent choice. Nice dress. She showed flare and personality that she hadn't showcased before. Randy thought it was good; Paula and Simon said it was a "safe" choice. They're laying the groundwork. Lakisha and Melinda are both going home this week.
Timberlake chose "Smooth" by Carlos Santana and Rob Thomas. It was dreadful. OMG The judges loved it. Paula said it was "hot". I need to stop watching this show. Jennifer worked with Haley on "Turn The Beat Around". Oh, Gloria Estefan remade it so I guess it qualifies as Latin. They brought Blake on to do some beatboxing in the rehearsal. I think I'm going to be sick. Haley came out in her little sister's booty shorts. Have you no shame? Go with what got you there, I guess. It couldn't be more obvious. The performance was brutal. Finally, even Simon told her that the only chance she has is to wear as few clothes as possible. Believe me, she already knew that. She should be on the block. I mean literally. She she be on the street corner with that outfit.
Creepy Phil is next. He did Santana's "Maria Maria". It was not hittin'. I am walking out if the judges like this. Randy and Simon said there was no passion and nothing to get excited about it. Paula said it was a good vocal. We'll of course ignore her. I can stay. I can remember a long time ago when I used to enjoy this show.
Jordin chose "Rhythm Is Gonna Get You". Has there been a song tonight that wasn't done by Gloria Estefan or Santana? It was an okay performance. Paula said she was adorable. Simon thought it was just okay, as I did. Blake did a song by Mark Anthony, Jennifer's husband. Kiss ass..................Is it over. I dozed off. The judges ate it up. I apparently have a different feed of the show coming into the House of Hollywood.
Last and certainly least, it's Sanjaya. He resembled a drowned rat. Unfortunately, he didn't do "She Bangs" like ew.com had suggested. That would have shot him into the stratosphere. He did a song which wasn't all that bad, which is the worse thing that could have happened to him. If my earlier prediction doesn't come true, it's Phil or Haley who will leave this week. Oh man, Jennifer Lopez is performing live tomorrow. Lord help us all.
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