Box Office Champ

Belated congratulations to Dwayne "The Rock"Johnson (above on the left-- hey, I have trouble telling those guys apart myself!), who had the number one movie in the country last week with Disney's The Game Plan. In totally unrelated wrestling news: he ain't never coming back!

The New Host of American Gladiators

How come I just can't seem to get this man out of my life? Just as it seems that he is never returning to the wrestling ring, now Hulk Hogan has been named as the new announcer for the all-new American Gladiators, which is coming back on NBC later this year. I hope he is doing color commentary because if he is doing play-by-play, this could derail the whole franchise again. I just hope they bring Diamond back.

And since I'm on the topic of Hogans, below is a picture of little Brooke Hogan at the Fox Reality Awards earlier this week with that idiot from last season's American Idol. Quite a boobarific little outfit. I'm mildly shocked.

More WWE Trouble

As if the roster wasn't thin enough already, WWE Champion John Cena suffered a torn pectoral muscle on Monday and is expected to be out of action for about six to eight months. A new champion will be decided on Sunday's PPV, although it hasn't been determined who will compete for it. Wow, good thing that they groomed and prepared all of that young talent so that they would be ready to step into a top spot just in case something like this happened. Oh yeah, they don't have shit on deck. Well, I guess politics, petty games, hiring tall muscle-bound clods who can't wrestle, and feeding the egos of the inner circle was more important. Maybe they can give the title to the son-in-law for the 80th time and he can defend the title in thrilling 3-on-1 matches. The future looks bright.

Dancing With The Stars Results

I'm just glad that the show is down to only two nights a week again. This week it was clear that most of the contestants are evenly matched, as it seemed that just about everyone got all sevens from the judges. The frontrunner still seems to be the young lady from the Cheetah Girls. Oh yes, the fix is in with Disney. This week some guy named Albert Reed got sent backing, just slightly edging out the guy in the Wayne Newton mask (above), who is this years' sentimental aging guy who traditionally stays in the competition for about three weeks too long.

Rock of Love Finale

The phenominal Rock of Love ended its season on Sunday in grand fashion. Bret went on dates with both of the final ladies then chose one at the final ceremony. In the end, probably figuring the stripper's best years were behind her, he chose 23 year old Jes (above). You had to feel bad for second place finisher Heather. She got ridiculed throughout the series for being a stripper, had an ill-fated tattoo of Bret put on her neck then presumably got tossed right before axed from the show. Of course, she went out in grand fashion by walking out without saying a word then talking a gang of trash-- just like her counterpart, "New York" from Flavor of Love. Somehow, I don't think we're going to be seeing Heather of Love anytime soon. I give the Bret/Jes relationship about two days. Can't wait for the reunion show next week.

Britney Loses Custody

After refusing to follow any of the conditions that were set by a judge last month (including drug tests, counseling, acting civilized, etc.) it was ruled that Britney Spears has to turn over custody of her children to Kevin Federline by noon on Wednesday. Obviously she didn't want them anyway, seeing as how she didn't attempt to follow not even one of the conditions that was set. Now she is free to get her drink on when she pleases and continue humiliating herself at every turn. Pathetic. And to think, at one time there was an actual "Christina vs. Britney" debate. Guess who won that one?

Paris on the Late Show

Paris Hilton got straight up clowned on Friday's Late Show with David Letterman. If you haven't seen it, you can check it out here.