Oh yes, it's time for the American Music Awards again. Fergie started the show off with a medley of about five of the most annoying songs of the year. Thank God for tight, sparkly dresses. Will I. Am performed as well, followed by the girl from the Pussycat Dolls who went solo. The sparkly dress did not save her performance because it was not tight.
Jimmy Kimmel was the host for the night and made the first writer's strike joke of the evening. Apparently all of his material was ad-libbed. He invited Jordin Sparks and Kellie Pickler of American Idol onstage to do the Soulja Boy dance. It was kind of funny.
Carrie Underwood presented the first award of the night, which went to Daughtry for the Breakthrough Artist of the Year. This thing is slowly starting to look like an American Idol reunion show.
Avril... Rascal Flatts... Maroon 5, moving on...
Jordin Sparks brought out the Jonas Brothers (?). A bunch of girls rushed the staged. Alas, this fell victim to the fast forward button.
...until, Jimmy Kimmel referenced that one of them fell down. I went back to watch and indeed one of the group members fell down upon hitting the stage. I was pressed for time and still watched this three times.
Best soundtrack went to High School Musical. Some of the cast members came out to accept. I recognized one of them from Dancing with the Stars and one of them for being naked on every gossip site on the internet.
In a strange match-up, country group Sugarland performed the song "Irreplaceable" with Beyonce. This was weird but good. I can't get "you must not know 'bout me" in that country twang out of my head.
Daughtry and Carrie Underwood were winning just about every other award. Idol is running away with this thing.
Celine Dion performed. Fast forward. You know I don't get down like that. Lenny Kravitz also did a new song that will be played to death over the course of the next year.
A commercial aired with Barry Manilow in it, giving me the chance to make my yearly "Barry Manilow looks like Barbara Walters" joke.
In the bad timing department, an old clip of Eddie Murphy aired right before Scary Spice hit the stage along with Kelly Taylor and the race car driver from Dancing with the Stars. They introduced Chris Brown. He danced. I had to fast forward-- hey, I also need to fit in hours of Survivor Series analysis tonight as well.
"Hannah Montana" made an appearance. I accidentally saw about ten minutes of her show a few weeks ago. It was as dreadful as I had predicted. Carrie Underwood won for something and Daughtry won the very next award.
Next was the best performace of the night from Alicia Keys. She did her new song then she brought out mid-90's reggae stars Chaka Demus and Pliers and Beenie Man. It was surreal. What, were Patra and Shabba Ranks not available? Alicia even did some choreographed dance moves. This was phenominal.
Duran Duran did their new song, blah, blah, blah, then went into "HUNGRY LIKE THE WOLF". Now this is what the people wanted to hear! Stick to the classics, fellas!
Carrie Underwood won for best country album. She said "if anyone had ever told me that I would have been presented an award by Slash and Scott Weiland, I would have never believed it". The camera cut to them and they looked like they would have rather been in Iceland.
Beyonce won an image award. We should all strive to be more like her.
MJB did her new song (see: Duran Duran), Latifah sang (does she even rap anymore?), Daughtery performed last, then Fergie won the last award for best rock female to end the show and that was that. Not bad a bad show but I was thankful that I watched it on tape delay.
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